Honesty – Day 11

When I first started writing about my journey towards £1,000,000 it was for my own personal record. The minute I decided to turn it into a blog, I had an overwhelming urge to censor my thoughts.

What on earth would people think about my attempts to vocalize my own greatness? It’s kind of embarrassing, but then that’s a problem a lot of women have. The majority of men I know are quite certain they are brilliant, even when they are not and I know dozens of incredible women who constantly do themselves down.

There should be no shame in realizing your own worth. I have three teenage children, one boy and two girls; what am I teaching them if I am too ashamed to admit that, at times, I am awesome.

Re-reading my posts, I also concluded that I sound very ungrateful. I want you to know that I am not. I am incredibly thankful for all that I have. A marriage that has lasted 20 years, three great kids, a lovely home, health and happiness. I am already rich.

Before I got hooked on Jen, money was a dirty word for me. I never asked for increased rates, I’d be afraid to ask friends to pay me back cash I’d loaned and I always assumed I just wasn’t great enough to earn serious money. My two sisters share the same attitude to money, so this is clearly something from our upbringing, but hey, we’ll leave that one to Freud.

That is the thinking that’s got me where I am today – not deliriously happy about my finances.

I am not too hung up on ‘things’, but I do want the freedom and choices that money buys. I don’t want to work like a dog until I am 80. I want to travel the world. I want my home to look its best. I want to treat friends and family – I’ve always loved giving presents more than receiving them. And I could do with a few more coats…

My mum lives in New Zealand and flies back every six months. I would love to be able to afford to buy her first class tickets every time.

Anyway, I am about to dive into Jen’s latest video. I am feeling a little tired as I was up at 5.30am for another business networking breakfast where the topic of online courses came up again. I am seriously going to have to look into this.

I’ll be back in 10…

Okay, well I love the quote Jen chose today:

“You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step,” Martin Luther King, JR.

Today, she talked about ‘chunking it down.’ To avoid overwhelm we need to prevent taking on too much information all at once. I am definitely suffering from overwhelm and vagueness – in case you haven’t noticed.

If it is a ‘Lofty goal that you are changing this year’ it is doomed to fail. Chunk it down and the chances are you will be more successful. I need to think about ways to do this. To make the most valuable use of my time and get it done.

15 minutes of writing every day (I did half an hour yesterday). One blog post every day. One new PR client per month and devise an online course in the next six months. I think I can handle that…

Jen says this helps you stay connected to the ‘novelty’ which is bound to wear off. That’s what I like about this blog. It keeps me accountable. I have started it now, so I have to finish.

Personal manifesto:

I am the boss of me and I am creating the reality of living life like a big fat wonderful badass. Yay!

 

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