Trying to be present – Day 299

I made a vow to be in the ‘now’ today and it has been bloody hard work.

I arrived at the railway station en route to my ballet class only to find there were no trains into town. ‘This is great,’ I thought to myself. ‘I’ll get to peer into people’s gardens from the top deck of a bus.’

When I arrived at the station that did have trains, I found that the usual platform for town was shut and there wasn’t a train for half an hour – that would mean I’d miss my class.

So I hopped into an Uber. Hooray for Uber!

Today’s ballet class cost me a whopping £50 in total – that’s £40 in travel and just £10 for the class. Still, it was worth it. It was an hour and a half long class and was a total escape from all the crap that’s been churning through my mind lately.

I attempted to lose myself in a book on the way home, but a drunk man sat next to me and insisted on asking a question every few minutes. I finally snapped at him and then felt bad when he got up and moved to another seat.

All in all, I didn’t do a great job of staying present. I felt frustrated, angry and disappointed. Then, I lost my rag when I got home to find my daughter lounging around the house in my best cashmere jumper – I wouldn’t mind, but she treats clothes with contempt, hence all of hers are balled in a corner of her bedroom and she had to pillage my wardrobe.

Oh well, the great thing about the ‘now’ is that there is a chance to get it right every second of the day.

Personal manifesto

I will get there eventually.

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