Sugar coated – Day 319

We flogged cards at a new location today and the punters were quite unlike any others we’ve come across. They were very much of the area – arty, moneyed and intellectual.

For some reason, I enjoyed interacting with buyers a bit more than usual. I didn’t really bother with my sales patter, I was just very chatty. It seemed to do the trick as we made double the amount we expected to at the event.

I think there’s a lesson about selling there – the harder you try, the less likely it is that you’ll close a sale, or at least that’s how it seems to be for me.

It was a lovely venue and I left my husband to it at lunchtime while I escaped to a cool cafe for good coffee and a sublime lunch. The cake looked divine, but I side-stepped it. I’ve been thinking about my eating a lot lately and there is far too much sugar going into my gob.

I had real issues with food as a child/teenager and although I am better now, it is still a ‘problem.’ I eat emotionally and ever since I did The Journey process, I’ve been shovelling sugar at every opportunity.

I’ve been reading Russell Brand’s Recovery – Freedom From Our Addictions and am finding it really helpful. I am an addict. I don’t turn to alcohol or drugs because a) I get drunk after one wine gum and b) I don’t like being out of control. Sugar is my drug of choice because for a start, it is acceptable and while I may be totally out of control whilst ploughing my way through a tin of digestives, to the outside world, it looks as if I am in the driving seat. Really, I am not. I am locked in the boot, wondering if I’ll ever get out.

I’m not sure I have the stomach for the 12 step programme though. It took Russell two whole days to list every single person who has featured in his life and jot down whether or not he had any grievances with them. I’m not a famous comedian and am sure I have less friends than Russell, but that feels like one hell of a job.

When you’ve done that, you must then read through the pages and pages of realisations with somebody who gives a damn. I wonder if anyone really gives a damn about me eating too many Kit-Kats?

Anyway, it is an interesting thought. Also, yet another person suggested I do The Landmark Forum the other day. This keeps coming up and everyone I meet who has done it, raves about it. I did go to one of their introductory talks, but didn’t like the hard sell aspect one bit. It makes me feel uneasy when people are desperate to sell to me. Ah ha – we are back to selling again. It’s life though really, isn’t it?  We’re constantly selling to one another…ourselves, our stories, our talents etc. I guess the answer here is to stop trying so hard and let things happen naturally. Easier said than done.

Personal manifesto

I don’t need to make an enormous effort to succeed.

 

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